How did I not see the hole punch thing until people pointed it out to me. It makes the whole thing even more ridiculous! Would not have guessed that is possible!

Dude in question is a sort of Green Lantern (Brief intro I wrote, largely mocking his other fashion choices). It looks like that thing is made up of magic green energy, so it's as flexible as he imagines it to be.

I bet his friends and loved ones are wishing otherwise, though. I always assume Molly, his wife, has forbidden him from buying clothes for himself. But while she can sneak the plaid ties and tapered neon trousers into the goodwill bin, it's harder to get at an ensemble stored in his imagination.