odditycollector: I could go on talking to you for several minutes before yeilding to the desire to bash my head in with a large rock. (Young Justice)
odditycollector ([personal profile] odditycollector) wrote2006-02-12 05:05 pm

Wait, I need a *title* for this?

A few days ago, [livejournal.com profile] __marcelo was wishing for a crossover between The Legion of Superheroes and... wait for it... the Cable & Deadpool intro pages.

Today I woke up and, for reasons known only to the deep recesses of my brain where I never go without a spork, thought "Yeah, why not?"

And.
 


The Story So Far

 
“Hiya folks. I’m Deadpool. Merc with a mouth and various other orifices which I won’t go into-“

“For fear of evisceration?”

“Something like that. Now it's your turn to tell them who you are.”

“There’s. No. One. There.”

“I thought you’d be better at breaking the fourth wall, really. I mean, your book has those nifty little letter pages.”

“A duty that, fortunately for my continued sanity, I’ve been thus far able to avoid.”

“Snicker.”

“...Did you just *say* ‘Snicker’?”

“Limitations of the format. And you got to say *continued* sanity, so it works out.”

“I’m not interested in the opinions of an uneducated primitive.”

“Takes one to know one.”

“I... You’re being childish.”

“You’re being childish.”

“Stop it at once!”

“Stop it at once!”

“...”

“...”

“...”

“..Okay, fine! You win (although I think that might have been cheating.)! Anyway, the smug looking green kid is Brainiac 5 from the planet of Cool.”

“Colu.”

“There, see? I knew you’d get the hang of this. I’ve somehow ended up a thousand years in another dimension’s future, thanks to previous plot points that you’d just skip over if I listed them.”

“No, wait. How *did* you get here. It makes no sense.”

“Angle bracket, sigh, angle bracket. You science types are way too obsessed with the details. It’s a wonder you ever blow anything up at all.”

“You have me confused with my previous incarnations. My latest character design is much more responsible and stable minded.”

“Riiiiight. We’ll go with that. Best I can figure-”

“Oh, *this* should be an valuable and informative exercise.”

“Thank you.”

“It was sarcasm, you nitwit.”

“In future talk, he’s probably asking for the name of my tailor. Sorry, pal. I’m not sure red and black would go with your complexion.”

“Argh.”

“But the writer is forcing me back on topic, so: your publisher has that whole Infinite Crisis in Infinite Miniseries thing going on.”

“The Legion is set a thousand years away from that mess, and further along the universal vibrolength scale besides. The title should be insulated well enough, unless Waid gets high on nostalgia and has us team up with Superman. And even that eventuality would hardly explain *you*.”

“Hey, I’m just going with what I know. We already had the continuity reboot over at Marvel, so I can recognize the signs. Gratuitous crossovers, guys with extra limbs, dead people turning into babies, and... You okay, Greenie? You look like you just realized you’ve forgotten to switch off the space-coffee maker.”

“Yes, it’s just. I have to check something in the lab...”

“Fine, leave me to run unsupervised among the unwary... Hey! Come back! I don’t even know where the nearest MacDonald’s is!

“Nice guy. I mean, okay, kind of an asshole, and the necrophilia’s a bit off-putting, but anyone running around in flesh-coloured spandex probably gets away with a *lot* of questionable behaviour -- Aw, maaan. I’m speaking in Canadian.

“Honour. Theatre. Cheque.

“Cable was right. The future is a horrible, horrible place.”

 

[identity profile] badficwriter.livejournal.com 2006-02-13 02:02 am (UTC)(link)
I want to quote you.

[identity profile] odditycollector.livejournal.com 2006-02-13 02:14 am (UTC)(link)
Feel free. (Although really Deadpool gets all the good lines.)

[identity profile] http://users.livejournal.com/__marcelo/ 2006-02-13 03:09 am (UTC)(link)
*WINS AT LIFE* As of this moment, I love your brain.

[identity profile] odditycollector.livejournal.com 2006-02-13 04:33 am (UTC)(link)
Well, too bad, you can't have it. :p

And anyway, this is *all your fault*.

[identity profile] chevauchee.livejournal.com 2006-02-13 03:24 am (UTC)(link)
Dude, I want to run around telling people I'm speaking Canadian now.

[identity profile] odditycollector.livejournal.com 2006-02-13 04:34 am (UTC)(link)
I would support such a thing! I mean, it probably counts as being bilingual, even.

[identity profile] chevauchee.livejournal.com 2006-02-13 04:37 am (UTC)(link)
Plus, there's the added comedy bonus of me announcing this in the type of American accent that makes 'creek' sound like 'crick'. It'll be fantabulous!

[identity profile] odditycollector.livejournal.com 2006-02-13 04:45 am (UTC)(link)
I had an Archie comic when I was younger where Jughead could speak fluent Canadian, and then totally made it with some hockey player. Um. At least, I think that was how it went.

[identity profile] katarik.livejournal.com 2006-02-13 03:57 am (UTC)(link)
I think that I would be more amused by this if I knew more of L.E.G.I.O.N and C&D other than the occasional posts made at s_d and the like, but as it is I am still snickering madly.

[identity profile] odditycollector.livejournal.com 2006-02-13 04:43 am (UTC)(link)
I'm glad it still worked, thanks!

(PS, because I would have to turn in my official comics fan license otherwise, "The Legion of Super-heroes" title is actually almost completely unrelated from "L.E.G.I.O.N," although I have been known to push people at both. This bit uses the green guy from the latest LOSH, v5 if you're counting, which is worth at least the checking out.

And C&D *does* have entertaining intro/summary pages.)

[identity profile] katarik.livejournal.com 2006-02-14 01:04 am (UTC)(link)
... *facepalm*
This would be me proving that I am a n00b. Ahahaha. Thank you for kindly correcting me.

[identity profile] odditycollector.livejournal.com 2006-02-14 02:08 am (UTC)(link)
Hey, better people than *me* have run off gibbering at the relevent DC continuity. If it helps, LEGION with dots is responsible for WomanMan (http://community.livejournal.com/scans_daily/192838.html), and the LoSH is resposible for well. Um. (http://community.livejournal.com/scans_daily/625758.html#cutid1) But no! I'm sure there valid differences!

[identity profile] caia-comica.livejournal.com 2006-02-13 05:35 am (UTC)(link)
This is HILARIOUS. I like, somehow, "I believe you have me confused with my previous incarnation." *snickers*

[identity profile] odditycollector.livejournal.com 2006-02-14 01:42 am (UTC)(link)
Well, you know. New Brainy is *much* more mature. I bet he hardly *ever* blows up labs just to see them explode.

[identity profile] marag.livejournal.com 2006-02-13 12:58 pm (UTC)(link)
::cackles madly:: This is hilarious :)

[identity profile] odditycollector.livejournal.com 2006-02-14 01:43 am (UTC)(link)
Glad you liked! (It was just so *obvious*, really, once it was pointed out.)
ext_11844: (Pinky!Bart & Brain!Tim)

[identity profile] amarin-rose.livejournal.com 2006-02-13 11:55 pm (UTC)(link)
*snerk* Dude, I've never wanted to buy comics solely to read the letter columns, but I just might start if they're half as funny as these. :)

[identity profile] odditycollector.livejournal.com 2006-02-14 01:45 am (UTC)(link)
Thanks!

(Although, the letter pages invariably end up on [livejournal.com profile] scans_daily. I mean, not that I don't support the buying of massive amounts of comics...)
ext_11844: (Default)

[identity profile] amarin-rose.livejournal.com 2006-02-14 04:57 am (UTC)(link)
Welcome!

(Dude, no, me neither.... Really *smirk*)

[identity profile] fullmetal-cute.livejournal.com 2006-02-14 10:33 pm (UTC)(link)
I am dead from giggling. If there is one person who could make Brainy's brain explode (even current continuity) other than Bart, it'd be Deadpool.

[identity profile] odditycollector.livejournal.com 2006-02-15 10:28 pm (UTC)(link)
Hee! Glad I killed you! Or. er.

And Deadpool has a *knack* for that sort of thing.

[identity profile] v-voltaire.livejournal.com 2006-02-15 09:14 pm (UTC)(link)
Hi. You probably don't know me, but I was friend-of-friend surfing and came across your journal. You are hilarious and have excellent taste in comic books. Do you mind if I friend you?

[identity profile] odditycollector.livejournal.com 2006-02-15 10:34 pm (UTC)(link)
Hi, nice to meet you. And feel free - I really don't have a friending policy, so there's no need to ask.