In the Tradition of Bad Victorian Poetry

[odditycollector]

 
daegaer writes, The world is a poorer place now that no one serenades cheese!

It's just so true.

And thus...





On the table, the colour of a fresh orange rind:
A block of cheese some inches thick,
and if one would measure, one might find
it roughly the shape and weight of a brick
(but much more edible, in my opinion).

Cheese! A better snack than fruit with mead;
there is no worry of choking on a pit.
And more polite than a loaf of hardened bread,
for it makes no sound when you cut it.
(and ever more satisfying than a meal of pinions.)

You may keep your chicken and mashed peas!
I think I would be rather pleased
to eat naught but that in front of me:
A fair slab of well aged cheese;
A goodly slab of well aged cheese.

For there is nothing quite so good as cheese.


.
.
.
*bowes*
Thank you, thank you. You’re too kind.

Comments

[daegaer.livejournal.com]

*weeps with joy at the abundance of poetic ichor speeding through your veins*

It's beautiful, truly beautiful!

[mshoneymonkey.livejournal.com]

wow thats one way of puttin it.. that was awesome... such splendor...!

[odditycollector.livejournal.com]

:D
Now all I need is an Ode to the Sewers, and then maybe I too can be a famous poet!

[odditycollector.livejournal.com]

Thank you! The recognition does my poet's soul good.

I was going to do another, expanding of the topic of how great it is to cut cheese, but I feel it would not live up to the exacting standards of the age.

[daegaer.livejournal.com]

Ah, such a topic is truly one for the ages. Only when one has climbed the slopes of Mt Parnassus, and striven fruitlessly in a dank and freezing garret for lo! many a year could one venture to write on such an august topic.

[pandap.livejournal.com]

hahahah! oh, man. It was the exclamation marks that did me in. Cheese!

*blushes*

[odditycollector.livejournal.com]

Cheese! An easier word to rhyme than opinion.
Which is why I should have, perhaps,
stuck it on the end of that
Because now I have to put something in...

[thecakemaster.livejournal.com]

I = own3d.

Shame people can't be mugged for writing skills.

Ping.

[odditycollector.livejournal.com]

Shame people can't be mugged for writing skills.
There's two ways of taking that, you know... ;p

My muse was just so lifted by that classic, the Ode to the Mammoth Cheese (7000 pounds), something had to give. Dude, If you ever have to take English again, you should use one of those poems (on the linked-to page). After all the laughing, your marker would be in a good mood.

[mshoneymonkey.livejournal.com]

may i post ur poem on my community or would u like to join moral_less?

[odditycollector.livejournal.com]

may i post ur poem on my community
Go ahead. Spread the Cheese!

or would u like to join moral_less?
Great idea for a community (and I love the background pic. Did you draw it?). However, pretty much the only writing I post online is fic, which is not at all what the community is about. (If you ever do a round robin or something, let me know. I'm a sucker for stuff that doesn't require original thought. ;)

[mshoneymonkey.livejournal.com]

o no... its a brian froud pic... i wish i could draw that tho... but im only so-so in the creative department