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I hear it is Valentine's Day! So, in honour of the occasion (and also because I may be stuck at a computer all day) a meme.
Give me a pairing (or a 3+some) and I will give you a brief summary of their totally overwrought love story! It will be like a Harlequin romance, except I have very little idea of how Harlequin romances actually work, so probably it won't be like that at all.
(And I actually made some attempt at putting together an offered fandoms list this time, but it's making me want to leave off the whole endeavour, so. The deal is that if I'm not familiar with the characters you give me, I'll ask for new ones.)
Give me a pairing (or a 3+some) and I will give you a brief summary of their totally overwrought love story! It will be like a Harlequin romance, except I have very little idea of how Harlequin romances actually work, so probably it won't be like that at all.
(And I actually made some attempt at putting together an offered fandoms list this time, but it's making me want to leave off the whole endeavour, so. The deal is that if I'm not familiar with the characters you give me, I'll ask for new ones.)
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Re: Excellent!
No, really, Gus, he’s got psychic powers now!
Then what did Gus have for breakfast?
Well, okay, Gus had bran cereal in soy milk sprinkled with superhero marshmallows, but anyone could figure that out from the dusting of sugar on the back of his hand and the bran bits stuck in his teeth. When you’re done grabbing your floss and running to the bathroom, Gus, ask Shawn something he couldn’t know without actual for real psychic powers!
Yeah? What is Gus thinking now?
Okay, Gus, that’s just rude. Not that anyone needs psychic powers for that lucky guess.
Though something that Shawn is just now, with the mind reading, realizing is how basically every single person who knows him thinks he and Gus are a couple! Chief Young Mrs. Landingham put them down in a report as an example of how her precinct works just fine with gay people and, sure, Shawn snuck off with a copy of that report before she sent it, but he assumed she was just bullshitting. Juliet: kind of a fag hag. Lassiter: endlessly worried about if finding Shawn THAT annoying means he’s homophobic, or unknowingly homosexual himself, or both, or maybe Shawn is just really annoying? Shawn’s Dad......
Shawn doesn’t BELIEVE this! He and Gus are not having the butt sex!
Shawn, why would you announce that in your outside voice when you and your best friend have just arrived at your father’s house for dinner? There are guests other than the three of you! Gus is pretty mortified right now, even by the scale of someone who has been hanging out with you for decades!
And anyway Shawn’s Dad really doesn’t want to know any details, like, at all.
And now everyone there thinks Shawn is having homosexual relations with Gus, and it is all they can think about the whole meal, and Shawn’s Dad catches him when he tries to sabotage the evening to get it over with faster. Way to go, Shawn!
Shawn’s Dad would like to know what the hell is wrong with Shawn!
He’s psychic.
Fine, Shawn. Don’t tell him. And be an asshole while you’re at it.
Also he’s not having the butt sex with Gus.
Didn’t Shawn’s Dad say he didn’t want any details!? He’s come to accept his son’s lifestyle choices but there are limits!
Later, Gus is driving him home in Gus’s company sedan, and Shawn is so upset he’s quiet for once. Gus wants to know what the problem is.
It’s that everyone thinks Shawn and Gus are a couple, and Shawn can’t convince them otherwise. And sure, Shawn can see where everyone got confused, because they are both far, far too attractive to be unattached, and charmingly eccentric, and Gus pays far too much attention to how his shirts match his shoes, and they are the only ones who understand each other’s senses of humour, and basically they are perfect for each other, but Shawn knows very well Gus is not into him that way!
Well, uh, okay Shawn! But Gus can’t help but notice you forgot to mention you are not into Gus that way either.
oh. yeah. I guess Shawn did.
Hey Shawn, if you are actually for real psychic, what is Gus thinking now?
I could tell you here what Gus is thinking, and what Shawn is going to say in response. But we as readers know the shape of this story, and don’t need psychic powers to guess its happy ending.
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P.S.